Psalms 139: 23&24….
Search me O God and know my heart: try me and know my thoughts
And see if there be any wicked way in me and lead me in the way of the everlasting
The Lord is not blind to our sins nor does he hold a grudge against us but we must take accountability for the things we do and ask forgiveness for them. We are not always walking in holiness because we are flesh and flesh does weaken but don’t make that weakness your resting place instead go to the Lord in all honesty and humility as you ask God to search your heart and cleanse you from all that is not pleasing to him. God is faithful and his mercies are renewed each and every day. Stop beating yourself up and come to the feet of the Master and let him cleanse and renew your inner man once again. He is a God of a second chance no matter how many times we fall short .
Love and Blessings